I’ve hit a new milestone as a parent – my son is now registered for kindergarten. So, if you could start handing me the tissues, that would be great.
We went to school registration last week, where my son walked into the cafeteria and proudly introduced himself to the teachers sitting at the tables. He even did a little dance for them. Then he left me in the dust and bounced from table to table, checking out the different activities to keep him entertained. When I picked him up after finishing the registration process, I ran into him and a teacher in the hallway. I promptly asked if they thought he was ready, and she confidently confirmed that he is.
Everyone warned me when I became a parent that this time would fly by. I knew they were right, but I didn’t know how right they were.
Part of me was hoping someone would step in and say that he wasn’t ready for school because then I would have one more year with my boy. But I know he needs to start this new chapter in his life, learn new things and make friends. As I was getting the items ready for the registration process, my mom told me, “This is the beginning of letting go.” As scary and bittersweet as that is, she’s right.
Don’t worry. I won’t subject you to a sob story of a blog. I’m not that kind of person.
What Does School Have To Do With Letting Go?
However, you’re probably asking yourself why I’m telling you about my son starting school and why I’m giving you the tip of the iceberg on how this makes me feel. What I’m trying to get at is that I’m having to teach myself how to let go of my son being at my side all the time.
Letting go is something I’ve always struggled with my entire life. Letting go of the memories of a bad relationship or situation, letting go the pain of working someplace that was detrimental to me in more ways than one, and even letting go of friends that I once thought would be in my life forever. And now, I’m learning to let go of my son being with me all the time while he becomes more independent.
The idea of letting go inspired the theme for this week’s blog. Perhaps you’re like me and have a hard time letting go. Maybe you have that trait and don’t know it. Whatever boat you’re in, letting go is never easy. With that in mind, I went to the internet for some tips on what could be done to make it easier. Here’s what I was able to find that could help:
Accept the truth and be thankful
This is almost self-explanatory. It’s essentially accepting what is and being grateful for what you have and also had.
Distance yourself for a while
This doesn’t just apply to physical distance. This can be an emotional or mental distancing. It can be healthy or even necessary to help with processing what is going on and how to eventually accept it. For me, this has been very helpful because it allowed me the opportunity to reflect and be with my thoughts.
Claim ownership and control your life
Claiming your role in what you need to let go of, then controlling your life to whatever extent you can, could help you to put some things in perspective. For instance, I’m having to claim ownership as the parent who registered my kid for school and I’m coming to the understanding of what this will change in my life. After all, for all these years I’ve become accustomed to a certain way of living, with my parents watching my son during the day while I worked, and then with the flexibility my job has allowed me to have regarding my son. This will now change into a new normal for me, and that shift of control is a little hard for me to swallow.
When was the last time you took focus of what you were feeling, or thinking about a situation or event that you needed to let go of? I’ll bet there were times that it was difficult to look inwards. It’s not easy because it forces you to take a real honest look at yourself and that can be as scary as it is difficult.
Change the people around you
Like I said earlier, I’ve had to let go of some friends in my life that I thought I would always hang out with. There were varying reasons why I chose to cut them out of my life and let them go. When I let go of those people, for whatever reason, I knew what I needed and I knew I didn’t want them in my life anymore. Looking back, I’m glad I let go of those individuals because it led to less drama in my life, and I was happier.
Focus on today
I love this point! While it can be hard, and tempting, to look back on what happened yesterday or last week or last year, the main thing to remember is that it’s in the past. Focusing on what’s going on today, in the here and now, is what matters. It helps to ground a person and be present in the moment.
At the end of the day, letting go is a process. No one can really say if it’s a short or long process, and I think most people would say that it depends on what’s going on that could dictate the length. I don’t know how long I’ll be feeling the beginning processes of letting go of having my son with me all day every day. But I imagine that once I realize that I’ve let him go, even if it is to kindergarten, it will shock me when it happens.
The team members with Albuquerque Plumbing Heating & Cooling have all had to let go of something at some point or another. It’s part of life. The parents have had to let go of their children when they had their very first day of school, we’ve all had to let go of a bad relationship, and a bad situation, no matter what it was. We’ve all had to process it in our own way and in our own time. And we’ve supported each other in those times.
If there’s something that you need to let go of, give yourself the grace and patience you will need to decide what that will be and how to let it go. Don’t rush the process. I’ll be working through the letting go process myself, so you’ll be in good company. We can get through this together.